Ruri is nowhere near your typical idol. Much like her fellow idol Kasuka, (Hanejima Yuuhei) she knows how to turn it on for the camera, but is nothing like her career makes her out to be. Since she's an actress, in addition to an idol and a model, Ruri is very much capable of pretending to be something which she most certainly is not. Her fans view her as delicate and girlish, much like the characters she plays on television. It is also stated that she possesses a type of inhuman charm which attracts people to her despite her melancholic temperament.
In reality, however, Ruri appears to be a young woman who isn't exactly sure of who, or what, she is herself. The delicate and unsure persona which fans view as the 'true' Hijiribe Ruri is little more than a façade which allows Ruri to downplay not only her sometimes frightening personality, but also her intense physical strength. What little insight is provided in regards to Ruri's personality seems to suggest that nearly everything about her life is a lie, and that she herself is quite unaware of who she is or who she wants to become.
This is demonstrated with her seemingly conflicting thoughts regarding becoming a monster. While it appears obvious that Ruri has an obsession with monsters in general, she also expresses a desire to become one herself at multiple points throughout the fourth novel. After being knocked out by Shizuo, she internalizes that she desires, more than anything, to be able to live a life free of constraints, able to do as she pleases without having to worry about anyone else's feelings on matters. When this is considered, it is slightly ironic that she ended up becoming a public figure, forced to hide her true self almost completely.
In all actuality, Ruri was forced to put on a façade from a young age, coming from a wealthy family which insisted upon keeping up a mask of tradition - one which Ruri herself states was stronger than she was. By learning to cover up her feelings from such a young age, Ruri appears to have lost some sense of who she truly is, which is what she tells Kasuka is her greatest fear. She doesn't really have any friends (she says that this is because she lacks the necessary social skills), or even anyone that she can identify with on any level, until she encounters three genuine "monsters" in the form of Kasuka, Celty and Shizuo. Ruri states that she idolizes them because of what they are, going so far as to say that she is glad that she met a true monster before her death (Shizuo), rather than a fake one like herself. She quickly identifies with Celty especially (likely because they are both supernatural beings to some degree). When it comes to Kasuka, however, she realizes that despite his lack of emotion, the desire he has to gain them is what makes him more human than she is. Whereas she is a human that wants to become a monster, he is a monster that wants to become human.
The sense of identity which she gains from these three allows her to finally realize that regardless of what happens to her, she must learn to enjoy every moment of what she is given. Before meeting them, she states that she felt dejected when she thought about what she was - something in between a human and a monster - but afterward, she embraced it.
Perhaps the most intriguing facet of her personality is her conflicting feelings over becoming a monster, as previously mentioned. When she wakes up in Kasuka's apartment after being knocked out, she wonders to herself why exactly she has become so miserable despite becoming what she had always aspired to be - a true monster. The intense self-hate and feelings of nausea begin to eat her alive as she berates herself for allowing feelings of guilt to enter her mind, since she knowingly murdered "those people". While the fact that she is a murderer would normally lead to the assumption that she is evil, this doesn't appear to be the case with Ruri. It is implied that her victims are all members of groups which have been hired to kill or capture her because of her 'special' blood. When this is considered, it almost makes Ruri appear to be the victim, forced to become something that she never really wanted to be, despite attempts to convince herself otherwise.
As the cycle continues, her attempts to convince herself that she is a monster undeserving of love grow, likely in an attempt to prevent those she loves from being hurt because of what she is. She says it herself that she has to become a monster which nobody understands in order to "let those bastards..." (she trails off before finishing, but it is assumed that she wants them to pay for what they are doing). It's also interesting to note that she states that she has to kill "him" or else someone else will be killed, furthering the idea that she doesn't kill for fun, but to protect herself (and possibly others).
Another reason to believe that Ruri doesn't truly wish to become a monster or be a murderer is her reaction when she pins Kasuka to the bed and threatens to kill him. She puts on a brave face for a moment before cracking, visibly shaking with fear at the thought of killing someone that didn't deserve to die. It is even stated that her consciousness threatens to leave her multiple times and she begins to cry, neither of which appear to indicate a cold blooded killer or a monster. These instances make her appear to be very emotional despite her apparent desire to be rid of such things. Ruri is also shown to be willing to go to great lengths for people that she cares about, which can be seen when she masquerades as a Headless Rider in order to aid Celty against the head-hunters and the motorcycle gang despite just having met her.
Ruri Hijiribe | Durarara!! | Reserved
Ruri is nowhere near your typical idol. Much like her fellow idol Kasuka, (Hanejima Yuuhei) she knows how to turn it on for the camera, but is nothing like her career makes her out to be. Since she's an actress, in addition to an idol and a model, Ruri is very much capable of pretending to be something which she most certainly is not. Her fans view her as delicate and girlish, much like the characters she plays on television. It is also stated that she possesses a type of inhuman charm which attracts people to her despite her melancholic temperament.
In reality, however, Ruri appears to be a young woman who isn't exactly sure of who, or what, she is herself. The delicate and unsure persona which fans view as the 'true' Hijiribe Ruri is little more than a façade which allows Ruri to downplay not only her sometimes frightening personality, but also her intense physical strength. What little insight is provided in regards to Ruri's personality seems to suggest that nearly everything about her life is a lie, and that she herself is quite unaware of who she is or who she wants to become.
This is demonstrated with her seemingly conflicting thoughts regarding becoming a monster. While it appears obvious that Ruri has an obsession with monsters in general, she also expresses a desire to become one herself at multiple points throughout the fourth novel. After being knocked out by Shizuo, she internalizes that she desires, more than anything, to be able to live a life free of constraints, able to do as she pleases without having to worry about anyone else's feelings on matters. When this is considered, it is slightly ironic that she ended up becoming a public figure, forced to hide her true self almost completely.
In all actuality, Ruri was forced to put on a façade from a young age, coming from a wealthy family which insisted upon keeping up a mask of tradition - one which Ruri herself states was stronger than she was. By learning to cover up her feelings from such a young age, Ruri appears to have lost some sense of who she truly is, which is what she tells Kasuka is her greatest fear. She doesn't really have any friends (she says that this is because she lacks the necessary social skills), or even anyone that she can identify with on any level, until she encounters three genuine "monsters" in the form of Kasuka, Celty and Shizuo. Ruri states that she idolizes them because of what they are, going so far as to say that she is glad that she met a true monster before her death (Shizuo), rather than a fake one like herself. She quickly identifies with Celty especially (likely because they are both supernatural beings to some degree). When it comes to Kasuka, however, she realizes that despite his lack of emotion, the desire he has to gain them is what makes him more human than she is. Whereas she is a human that wants to become a monster, he is a monster that wants to become human.
The sense of identity which she gains from these three allows her to finally realize that regardless of what happens to her, she must learn to enjoy every moment of what she is given. Before meeting them, she states that she felt dejected when she thought about what she was - something in between a human and a monster - but afterward, she embraced it.
Perhaps the most intriguing facet of her personality is her conflicting feelings over becoming a monster, as previously mentioned. When she wakes up in Kasuka's apartment after being knocked out, she wonders to herself why exactly she has become so miserable despite becoming what she had always aspired to be - a true monster. The intense self-hate and feelings of nausea begin to eat her alive as she berates herself for allowing feelings of guilt to enter her mind, since she knowingly murdered "those people". While the fact that she is a murderer would normally lead to the assumption that she is evil, this doesn't appear to be the case with Ruri. It is implied that her victims are all members of groups which have been hired to kill or capture her because of her 'special' blood. When this is considered, it almost makes Ruri appear to be the victim, forced to become something that she never really wanted to be, despite attempts to convince herself otherwise.
As the cycle continues, her attempts to convince herself that she is a monster undeserving of love grow, likely in an attempt to prevent those she loves from being hurt because of what she is. She says it herself that she has to become a monster which nobody understands in order to "let those bastards..." (she trails off before finishing, but it is assumed that she wants them to pay for what they are doing). It's also interesting to note that she states that she has to kill "him" or else someone else will be killed, furthering the idea that she doesn't kill for fun, but to protect herself (and possibly others).
Another reason to believe that Ruri doesn't truly wish to become a monster or be a murderer is her reaction when she pins Kasuka to the bed and threatens to kill him. She puts on a brave face for a moment before cracking, visibly shaking with fear at the thought of killing someone that didn't deserve to die. It is even stated that her consciousness threatens to leave her multiple times and she begins to cry, neither of which appear to indicate a cold blooded killer or a monster. These instances make her appear to be very emotional despite her apparent desire to be rid of such things. Ruri is also shown to be willing to go to great lengths for people that she cares about, which can be seen when she masquerades as a Headless Rider in order to aid Celty against the head-hunters and the motorcycle gang despite just having met her.